Showing posts with label soho theatre. Show all posts
Showing posts with label soho theatre. Show all posts

Small Talk 05 - Void Story by Alex Eisenberg

Void Story by Forced Entertainment

Soho Theatre

24th April 2009


7.32pm – 7.37pm


Unreserved Seating:

Fourth Row – Seat 7/8/9 - (A)

Fourth Row – Seat 8/9/10 - (P)

On Stage – Usher (U)


You can read an introduction to Small Talk here.

______________________________________


7.32pm


A: Hello…How are you?

P: Are you supposed to sit here?…no…

A: Sorry?

P: Are you sitting with him?

A: No…

P: Oh okay…Sorry I thought you were with him.

A: Oh…I thought you were together!

P: Oh no…[ALL LAUGH]

A: No…I’m on my own actually.

P: Oh okay…


[PAUSE]


A: I’m a bit puffed out!

P: Yeah I just ran here as well.

A: Okay…

So what do you reckon it's going to be like?

P: Probably quite slow…

A: Why do you say that?

P: Cos they often…they can do that sometimes…be very slow…Have you seen stuff before?

A: Yeah I have.

P: But you know…I like it so…

A: You like slow?

P: I don’t mind…well…I kind of like a bit of both…the text is often good so…they can get away with it.

A: So you’ve seen quite a lot of their work before have you?

P: I’ve been seeing them for a long time…yeah…yeah…

A: Got any favourites?

P: ‘Dirty Work’…that’s quite a long time ago. ‘Speak Bitterness’…that’s a while back umm…I like their earlier stuff better actually.

A: Okay…so you’ve been a long time follower and it's 25 years in the making.

P: But I mean…I saw some of that on video…yeah…’Dirty Work’ I saw live…yeah…I did a workshop thing…like a residency with them in ninety-nine…ten years ago now…which was good but…

[LOUD]

U: Hi guys, welcome to Soho Theatre!

If I could just ask you all just to scooch along just a tiny tiny bit…In front of all of you is a number on the back of the chairs in front of you…if you all look at a number and all sit behind one that would be perfect. Because then we can get 14 people to every row…cos we’re completely sold out. Thanks a lot!


A: That was funny! …It is quite squashed in here isn’t it?

P: I think they always have to do this…and they do this speech…

A: They’re used to it…she seemed quite practiced.

Oh right…we’re getting into seat 9 and 10 here.

P: That’s right [LAUGH]

A: It's amazing how much room there is when we all…

P: Yeah…you see everyone wants to give themselves a bit more personal space.

A: Well also these seats, you know they’re quite…

P: Rigid?

A: Rigid…yeah [ALL LAUGH]


[PAUSE]


A: So have you been to anything else in Spill?

P: No I haven’t…I haven’t had a chance…I’m just going to see this and the other one tonight and that’s it…that’s all I’ve been able to…I would have liked to have seen some of the stuff last week but…

A: Oh you are seeing the show after?

P: Yeah.

A: That’s good.


[PAUSE]


A: So…are you involved in the arts at all?

P: Not really any more no…I look after my son now.

A: Oh wow!

P: Yeah!

A: How old is he?

P: He’s two.

A: Lovely…that’s your full time work is it?!

P: I used to do a bit…just marketing stuff…but I have to look after him now.

A: But you didn’t want to bring him along tonight though?!

P: I don’t think I could handle it!

A: Really! Is he a bit of a…

P: Well he’s in bed now.

A: Yeah.

P: He’s normally in bed about seven, seven-thirty. It's how it is with that age.

A: It would be good to go to bed at seven-thirty…

P: I go to bed about nine-thirty…[LAUGH]

A: Oh really! You’re an early sleeper?

P: Well I have to because he gets up at half six…otherwise I…I like my sleep so…you know…

A: That’s being a mum, isn’t it?

P: It's like…going to bed at eleven feels like a late night. Like, I watch a movie and I’m like…wooo ‘late night’. [LAUGH]

Gone are the days of drunken craziness!…Well I still do that occasionally but…you know…

A: Well I suppose you sort of succumb to the schedule of your child…
P: Yeah…they take over…

A: Yeah…It's interesting that…I’m not in that sort of schedule I’ll be honest with you!

P: It's funny…it does take over…I wasn’t before and now… you’re like…wow it's a very different thing!


[PAUSE]


A: I’ve been wondering what it's like to sit up there on those stools.

P: Probably not good.

A: It seems to be going quiet now…


7.37pm






VOID STORY







22.21pm























To find out about Alex's Small Talk click here: Small Talk by Alex Eisenberg


Below are links to the other conversations that I have had:

Small Talk 01 - Inferno

Small Talk 02 - That Night Follows Day

Small Talk 03 - Purgatorio

Small Talk 04 - Saving the World


Alex Eisenberg is an artist making performance. He is helping to coordinate SPILL: Overspill over the course of the festival.

(w)hole story by Eleanor Hadley Kershaw

Soho Theatre

20-25 April 2009


The last few audience members are squeezed onto the benches of Soho Theatre studio. It is warm and stuffy, but a buzz of anticipation permeates the thick air above the steeply raked auditorium. A Forced Entertainment performance is about to start: I am expecting that once the steward has ripped my ticket and I have chosen my place and I have sat down and I have taken off my coat and placed my bag under the seat, once the houselights have (maybe) gone down (or at least dimmed a little bit) and once the performers are on stage and the audience quietens… I am expecting that theatrical conventions will be challenged, form will be played with, and that this performance will stimulate some thoughts about my – our – relationship to what’s going on down there below. And maybe more.


The rules of Void Story are clear soon after the performers have entered and taken their seats. As Mary Paterson describes, the four of them are tools, props, components in the telling of this story. They perform the function of sound: the voices of the protagonists, Kim and Jackson, are spoken into microphones by two performers at individual desks on one side of the stage, a lamp and a script next to each of their mics. Effects are created live or triggered from a soundboard on the long desk behind which the other two sit, on the opposite side of the stage. They speak the voices of subsidiary characters into more microphones, adjusting settings on two Mac laptops. A screen fills the gap behind the two pairs, onto which high contrast monochrome collages are projected; rough cut-and-paste snapshots of a desolate and threatening landscape through which a man and woman journey – the image version of Jackson and Kim – posed photos of two new faces, not the performers speaking in front of us. It’s all laid out for us to see, production methods stripped bare, each dislocated ingredient needing our imagination, our effort, our presence, to come together into a whole. The performance is two dimensional and we are the third dimension.


It will continue like this. A string of terrible events are inflicted on Kim and Jackson by the narrative, but they carry on across this harsh landscape, with no grand purpose and no final destination. They receive a visitor, who shoots Kim in the stomach. They receive intrusive phonecalls. They are stung by bees, they swim through shit, they climb over a tower of decomposing waste. They are chased by an open-jawed bear and a pack of angry dogs. We carry on filling in the grim void, just as Jackson, eyes closed, led by Kim, can still imagine the human entrails scattered along their path, at which Kim recoils.


Despite the horrible content of the narrative, this framing of catastrophe seems safe – everything is settled from early on – the concept is there, so we just need to apply our imaginative glue and join Kim and Jackson for ‘a rollercoaster ride through the decimated remains of contemporary culture’, as Tim Etchells’ programme note suggests. The violence and misfortunes that the characters suffer bring to mind a horror or disaster film, their ability to brush themselves off and continue after deadly injuries, a cartoon. No-one will really get hurt here, the good guys will survive till the end - it’s all just a bit of light entertainment, right? It’s not real.


But the general effect is far from calming. The sound is almost unbearably loud: at times I feel like I am being pinned to the back of my seat by the force of it. In imagining all these nasty events, and in battling against the volume of noise, and in the heat of the space, this experience is often uncomfortably challenging. It doesn’t allow the quick fix spectacular escapism on offer in Armageddon or The Day After Tomorrow. Maybe it comes closer to the gritty warning of Children of Men, or Cormac McCarthy’s The Road.


But it is still safe, it is darkly comic. It is apparent that this formula will not change and the narrative will reach no climax… rather we will continue uneasily trawling along a desperate grey plateau with its protagonists. After a while they encounter a sinister child on a bleak estate and she asks for some help with her balloon, it is stuck in a nearby tree. No-one else can help as they sleep during the day and work at night: “Our schedules don’t overlap much.” Kim and Jackson deliberate over whether –

There is whispering in the row behind me.

A young woman is slumped on the shoulder of the woman next to her, eyes shut, the people around are fanning her face.

She has probably fainted. Turn back to the stage

– Jackson is high up in the tree, “Jackson, be careful”. The balloon is shot by a –

but the whispering gets louder,

a man stands by the young woman. “Can you hear me? I’m a first aid officer. Can you hear me?”

To the panicked woman at the girl’s side: “Was she with anyone?”

“I’m her mother.”

Her name is repeated several times. “I’m the first aid officer, can you hear me?

…Has she eaten anything today?”

Glance back at the screen for a second – Jackson and the sinister girl and Kim are on the move, they are – then back up to the woman. Someone comes down from the back bench onto the stage, it is Tim Etchells. The performers’ voices halt, the houselights are brought up. “I’m very sorry, but we’re going to have to stop the show. There’s a medical problem.” He looks up at the young woman.

Everyone turns and looks.


A steward: “Is there anyone with any medical experience here? Is there a doctor in the house tonight?”

No response. Someone says, “She needs to be put in the recovery position.”


Everyone continues to look at the young woman and her mother in the middle of the seating bank. Her skin is grey.


The first aid officer calls an ambulance: “yes, she’s breathing but she’s not conscious.”


We stare.


No-one does anything.


This moment lasts a long time.


We stare.


A steward asks us to all to take a break outside the studio. We slowly filter out, dazed. We wait.


I think: So, is Void Story a disaster performance? It has presented us with a post-apocalyptic landscape, but the usual constraints of realism don’t apply. With a dream-like logic the protagonists have reacted to each crisis without ever considering the bigger picture (without the ‘sop of psychology’ as Tim Etchells writes): just like this show’s detailed attention to each individual component, and its intentional neglect of a complete, finished end product. We have been presented with a flat pack performance.


We’re thanked for our patience, and told the show will continue.


We wait.


I think: The performance has so far been deliberately out of sync with itself. Aside from the incongruities between aural and visual representation, and the strangely narrow outlook of the protagonists, the images have had warped perspectives within themselves because they are haphazardly thrown together from the elements of other compositions.


We’re told that the paramedics have arrived, that the performance will be started as soon as possible.


We wait.


I think: The performers’ style has been brilliantly underplayed and deadpan, always ensuring we’ve been aware that they are “just acting”, just reading from the script, just doing their job. They have been playing at being these characters, reminiscent of children doing the voices of their toys, or parents reading out picturebook speech bubbles to pacify at bedtime.


We are told that the young woman is looking a lot better now that she has received some medical attention, and that the show will be restarting soon.


We filter back into the studio, staring at the ominous empty space where the girl and her mother were.


Tim Etchells thanks us all for waiting, and tells us that the young woman is fine now and has been taken home. They’re going to rewind a bit:


– “Help me!” cries the sinister girl on the bleak estate. “Please help me!”, words spoken into a microphone that stretches Terry O’Connor’s voice into a high-pitched squeal. Jackson says, “This is one of those dilemmas that really tests one’s strength of character.” The audience laughs. “Do you run or do you help?” More laughter. “I’d say run…”


The performance continues through to the abrupt unconcluded end that sees Kim and Jackson in a final moment of inaction. But that scary intermission has changed the nature of the experience. Our expectations are blasted and nothing feels quite so safe anymore, now that we’ve been reminded that anything is possible, that unexpected eventualities can occur anytime, anywhere. And also it feels doubly safe, because nothing else unplanned will happen now, the chances of two emergencies in one show are very slim. Something shocking and demanding and real intruded into the set rules of representation, and we didn’t know how to respond. The light responsibility of creating a piece of theatre together immediately switched to the shared weighty onus of how to handle this unforeseen occurrence.


The spectacle of this episode was defined by our inaction – by our handling of it as something to be observed rather than acted upon – just as the final image of the performance shows Kim and Jackson giving up on reacting and trying out just doing nothing. Whilst we knew clearly how to play the game that the show proposed, this situation was uncertain, unguided, unknown. There were some attempts towards protocol, but it was clear to all that the possible directions were out of our remit, we couldn’t control them, and so we did nothing. We were helpless and redundant. Having re-entered, there is now a new definition of ‘uneasy’ attached to this space, and the loudness and disjunction of the performance have become comforting solid certainties. We watch the rest of the show, happy to be able to achieve something together, something that elegantly falls within the realms of our comfort zone, stretching us only as far as we choose to go. It’s in our hands again now.


Eleanor Hadley Kershaw is a writer focusing on performance and live art, currently based between Brussels, London and Bristol. ehadleykershaw@googlemail.com

Mind The Gap - Robin Deacon’s Prototypes by Rachel Lois Clapham

Prototypes

Soho Theatre

16-18 April 2009


Robert Deacon: Good evening ladies and gentleman. For this evening’s performance of Prototypes, I have been commissioned by my son.

Robin Deacon: That’s me

Robert Deacon: To play the part of ….

Robin Deacon: [whispering audibly in Robert’s ear] third person omniscient narrator.

Robert Deacon: Third person omniscient narrator.

[Cue Robert on the Xylophone]


And so Robin and his dad, Robert, open the performance of Prototypes with a short turn on the xylophone and an air of formal ceremony.

Prototypes is a show that uses a working model railway as stage for a subtle play on autobiography, documentation and the passing of time. The model in question is a makeshift MDF section of British Rail track that is visible from the upper window in the former home of Robin’s Aunty Monica, in 5 Martin Court, Southall. This window was the one in which Robin stood as a child in his school holidays. Where he watched the Class 253 trains in intercity livery pass by. It is where he thinks he may have developed a love of railways and trains – even model ones - and where the fascinations with timetables started.

Robin re-enacts that childhood scene with his model - which includes a hastily blacked-up plastic figurine (representing Robin), stood in front of the cut-out cardboard window of 5 Martin Court watching the model trains. Throughout the performance, he also presents video footage from the original view upon which the prototype is based; we see First Great Western train services rumble past the window of 5 Martin Court, the actual flat from which his Aunty Monica has long since gone. When the trains are gone, the video records the empty, grey and wet stretch of Southall.

Robin wears a pair of dark running shorts and white T-shirt with the word OPERATOR on the back. As ‘operator’ he spends the first part of Prototypes sitting at a makeshift audio-visual desk at the back of the stage, hidden behind equipment, happily engrossed in twiddling various knobs and widgets relating to the model trains and the on screen video footage. At other times, he runs around the railway’s trestle tables an awkward, high legged canter, frantically assembling and disassembling the trains. Robin’s operational role on stage troubles the notion of utility versus its excess: performance. It poses the question, is it possible to merely operate or facilitate without performing? So too Robin’s operator ‘costume’ is functional, a workers uniform or a non-costume, but on stage this very functionality goes beyond appearance, it is seen to appear as performance. These paradoxical acts of erasure provide a glimpse into just how Prototypes - and in general how performance, as opposed to theatre - is complexly embroiled in function and reality. And although it is quite possible that Robin’s awkward run could be nothing to do with ‘performance’ at all, and more to do with Robin’s level of physical fitness, I suspect some camping is going on here too.

In contrast to all this (non)performance and train related chaos is Robert who, as third person omniscient narrator- or first person impersonator as he sometimes referred to by Robin- speaks the story of Prototypes with a wry, reserved demeanour that bears an uncanny resemblance to Robins’ own understated, satirical persona.

The story Robert tells is one of prototypes themselves - of equivalence, scale, representation and archetypal base form. These things are looked upon through the lens of the model railway, its language, politics and aesthetics. We are taken into the world of the model railway convention, where modellers – the vast majority of whom are white, British, retired enthusiasts - showcase in-depth miniature scenes. The models are strange amalgams; soil collected from the original geographic location, upon which mini lighthouses, railway sheds or outhouses are brought together to create an approximation, a picture postcard of quintessential Englishness. They are fictional but equivalent representations of a certain place and time. Specific re-enactments of an idealised version of the English countryside circa 1950’s; a sparsely populated (with white people) land of green and plenty. The prototype that emerges from all these models is troublingly utopian. Prototypes delves into these miniature aesthetics; a world in which 0.5 mm makes a difference, where aged, conservative model makers attempt (unwittingly or otherwise) to simulate a purity of experience, youth and Englishness, and scale things down in an attempt to exercise control over an increasingly uncertain world. Prototypes articulates railway models and their makers as unable to be apolitical, and their endeavours politically loaded. Megalomania and outmoded modernist tendencies concealed in the form of a harmless British past time.

Robin’s attempt to place himself (as mixed race, as young man, as artist) in this world - both in the fantasy English landscape of the models, and the world of the typical model railway convention goer – in his re-enactment inevitably fail. But it is the attempt or the acting out of the re-enactment that is critical. It is both political statement and recompense then, that Robin’s own model of Southall is very British in an everyday, post industrial way. His is a very different sort of English prototype: one that embodies the fact that quite often ‘nothing happens’, both in life and on railways, one that takes account of local immigration, (Robin’s) mixed British heritage as well as the wet grey reality of Southall.

A similar aesthetics of failure is also being re-enacted in Robin’s attempt, mid way through the performance, to simulate the timetabled operations of the 8.59 Network South East service running through Southall on 17 April 1990. It was an impersonation that was doomed from the start. The vigorous piston movements of his arms, his precise buffering gestures and grinding noises aptly demonstrated the infidelity of representation and the inbuilt failure of re-enactment; it will never copy exactly. But Robin’s actions show how re-enactment, in its enthusiastic and imprecise nature, goes beyond off the shelf or pre-fabricated representations or presets - replica trains, crafted figurines, tiny signal boxes - to create something that is more holistic, sympathetic and perhaps more akin to the original event, or prototype.

This gap between reality and re-enactment is a recurring motif in Prototypes. At one point, Robin starts the miniature train on its journey past the model no. 5 Martin Court. By the time the train rattles precariously past the prototype window, Robin has (just about) managed to clamber back over the set to stand centre stage in front of the video screen, upon which is a magnified live stream of Robin’s on stage Southall prototype. In that carefully choreographed (and nearly missed) moment we watch Robin, his back to us, watching his prototyped plastic self on screen watch the model train. It is a heady mix. One in which Robin views himself through the video projection of his own prototyped past. And we see the dialectical tension between being and self-identification played out through the different forms – body, prototype, video and documentary. First person impersonator, Robert, acts as mediator; he speaks Robin’s scripted words as his own. He blackens his (white) face and dons an acrylic afro wig. It is Robert as narrator through which identity is performed as dislocated, fragmented and performative in Prototypes, in short re-enacted, not authentic, essential and whole.


Rachel Lois Clapham is Co-Director of Open Dialogues.

Not Waiting by Mary Paterson

Intermission

Soho Theatre

22-24 April 2009


Intermission. The middle. The in-between. The time when you have a drink in the bar, or the performer in Pacitti Company’s Intermission drinks beer in the middle of the stage. Thinking time, when something has ended and before something else has begun. Intermission. When the world is still going on around you.

At the start of Pacitti Company’s show, Sheila Ghelani – the only performer onstage throughout – unveils nine cloaked figures. Like furniture stored under dustsheets, these figures have been waiting quietly, while the audience fills the auditorium. Ghelani reveals them to be nine microphones, each bearing a label: ‘Fiction’, ‘Glossary’, ‘Fact’, ‘False Starts.’ She moves between the mics, talking straight to the audience with the confidence of a practised speaker, the determination of someone with something to say.

At first it is obvious what these different mics stand for. At ‘Glossary’, Ghelani reads out a litany of terms to describe immigration; at ‘High Horse’ she describes a set of reasons why ‘they’ shouldn’t come ‘here’; at ‘Fact’ she tells us about the emigration and immigration of the swallow. The mics are different sides to an argument, different means of expression – even if they’re different means that could be used by the same person. But before long, this clarity of purpose is dissolved. Ghelani’s subjects become more personal – sex, death, love, ambition – and she stands at ‘High Horse’ wondering why things have turned out for her the way they have. ‘…And I feed myself,’ she says, ‘I mean, that’s not the done thing, is it? In this day and age – for a woman to feed herself.’

At these moments, the simple set-up on stage stops being a device for communication and becomes a very urgent means of understanding the complexities of another mind. The mics, with their neat labels, might stand for different points of view, but Ghelani (and it does feel like Ghelani, a real person and not a character performed, who is confronting us on stage) won’t be divided up and packaged neatly. She needs all these mics and more; she needs to stand at them and amid them; she has an opinion and also something further, something in-between.

When she is not speaking with soft determination into the microphone, Ghelani fixes the audience with an electric stare and dances towards us. She flicks her wrists in flamenco, or shakes her hips to the punch-line of a joke, and all the time her eyes are fixed on us, fixating us with the sharp sting of another person appearing in full. The thrill of Intermission is in the shocking vitality of this person on stage: the complexity of her thoughts and the richness of the way she moves. When she tackles death Ghelani walks to the microphone called ‘Fact’ and falls silent. This vital, full person – Stops. It is an apt metaphor for the unknowable-ness of death. For the audience watching, for a short, shivering moment, it also enacts the loss and terror that death brings. It’s a relief when Ghelani returns to us, smiling a knowing smile, full of life and energy once again.

This energy is sustained, in part, by a continuous soundtrack that ripens Ghelani’s conversational language. Sometimes a musical accompaniment, sometimes famous words uttered by famous people, and once, most memorably, the looped, rhythmic sound of someone weeping, the soundtrack both drives Ghelani’s speech forwards and snags the words back again. The rhythm acts as imperative and remainder, providing a continuous flow that connects the work to itself, as well as an atmospheric counter-reading of Ghelani’s thoughts. When she talks about love, for example, it is to the jaunty sound of a marching band, an incongruous mix that emphasises the banality of the list of sexual positions she recites. But this incongruity also emphasises the importance of Ghelani’s description of a single lover’s glance. The music drives the rhythm of the list only to dilute its sexual content - and, therefore, the latent eroticism of a woman reciting it on stage – which emboldens, instead, the eroticism of something far more personal.

In fact, Intermission is made up entirely of ‘something far more personal’. Pacitti Company’s in-between time is not a waiting room for life, it’s the very stuff of life itself. It is the thoughts and opinions that don’t have a department to fit into. It’s the mess that spills into a human being. And what can you do with all this information? The final, iconic scene poses a question about what it means to understand another person in full. Do you see her energy burning bright, or do you watch her energy burn away?


Mary Paterson is a writer and producer, and Co-Director of Open Dialogues. mary@opendialogues.com

On being with her by Theron Schmidt

Vanessa: Look mummy, I’m dancing

Soho Theatre

15 April 2009

She’s not like other women. She watches a man hassle and belittle his female partner in the supermarket checkout, and, so she tells us, she wonders whether she made the right choice. She’s not like other women, born anatomically male, but, so she tells us, convinced from her first breath that something was not right. She’s not like the others, who never had to be ostracised, pathologised, diagnosed condescendingly with gender identity disorder. She’s not like the rest, for whom easy remedies are available and unremarkable for their body issues: a little nose job here, a little liposuction there. She’s not like the others, because she was one of the first.


This is Vanessa’s story, of how she always identified herself as a woman and eventually became the first transsexual in Belgium. But what’s surprising in Vanessa’s story is how familiar it all seems. Her story rests on a series of scenes that feel commonplace, almost shorthand, like little photo-postcard moments. The boy who is not like the other boys. The mother who worries about whether she wished too hard for a girl. The father who wants his boy to play football. The goodbye to the first lover at a train station, crowded with homeward bound soldiers. The angelic Moroccan nurse who comforts her after the surgery.


Even at its most moving, there’s something almost self-consciously emblematic about her story. The scene where she tells her mother that no, she’s not acting anymore – she’s dancing, and the awful pathos of her mother’s realisation that ‘dancing’ is a euphemism. The scene of reconciliation, when her supposedly uncompassionate father asks her to come close, for he ‘has another daughter now.’ These are moving, heartfelt moments, moments you would want in a good screenplay, or a season finale. They are truthful moments of vulnerability and compassion – but, in a story about a life that is so unconventional, it is striking how much they are conventionally so.


The whole piece has this easy, light-hearted attitude toward theatre. In contrast with the rest of the festival, this is not an occasion for provocation or experimentation. It’s a tidy story that would disturb no one, that is told conversationally but that is also obviously a carefully prepared script, one that is filled with pathos and bathos and ends happily with marriage.


Without wanting to assume too much from her story, perhaps her complicated life has left her particularly attracted to these uncomplicated moments. What others might take for granted – the obvious and familiar of the everyday – may not have been common, easy, or obvious to her. Perhaps this story is an expression of a desire for this clarity, for an unproblematic match between how things seem and how they are. Or maybe she has been aware of the singularity of her life all along, has lived it as a biopic in the making, selecting scenes as she lives through them. I don’t know. I don’t know what it’s been like to be her, despite having heard her life story. How could I?


But the story she tells is only part of the experience. It’s one reason I’m here, in order to hear her story, but I’ve also come in order to see her. She’s come to tell her story, but she’s also come to show. To appear before us. To appear before us in this body that she has made for herself, and to speak in the voice that she has claimed as her own against significant obstacles. And it’s a remarkable body, with something liquid and changeable about it. Tears always just behind her eyes, and a softness in the back of her throat. She leans and sways across the stage, holding each of us in her eyes, and being held herself in ours. Look mummy, I’m dancing.


When Vanessa impersonates her mother, it is clear that something of her mother lives inside her, and when she impersonates her father, it is also clear that her body has both woman and man and inside it. Being in my body, being together with other bodies, as we watch her, I have a sense of the collective body. Not just as an aggregate of us to which we each contribute our individuality, but in the sense of a collection, a gathering of parts and pieces and histories that each of us claim but that none of us really own. How my body is both mine, but also the vessel through which my culture acts upon me. How the way that each of us holds our body is partly determined by the collective hold over us, and the way that the common’s hold over us is through our bodies, through our bodies on display, through the way we must appear to each other. The theatre: the seeing place, the space of appearance.


And then the part of the experience that consists of her telling a story comes to an end, and what’s left is just us being in the room together. The proximity of our bodies, the crossing of our gazes, our being in common. We are clapping for each other now. And this is a moment of pure acknowledgement, a moment of affirmation which goes both ways, and I find myself to have become liquid too, spilling over with emotion. Engaged in this nonsense gesture, clapping clumsy hands against each other, as a pretence to prolong the moment, to permit this last look at each other before we return, again, to the conventions and dramas of everyday life.

Theron is a writer and performer. http://www.newworknetwork.org.uk/theron